My husband and I creatively collaborated for a sixth time! I introduced him to another one of my childhood favorites; the kid’s horror anthology TV series from the O.G. ’90’s SNICK (short for Saturday Night Nickelodeon) channel called Are You Afraid of the Dark? It’s a re-imagined take of Twilight Zone, slapped with a G rating, infested with young Canadian actors, and a thrilling, chilling rollercoaster ride! We utilized this show for his new-ish magazine called: Rob’s Video (you can purchase it here).
The street lights have just come on, so go ahead and tie your favorite flannel around your waist, put on your slap bracelet, grab your boombox, and get cozy by the campfire for a secret hangout with your BFFs. “Submitted for the approval of The Midnight Society, I call this story [sprinkles powdered non-dairy creamer onto the flames]: The Tale of the _____________.”
The following throwback Nickelodeon’s Are You Afraid of the Dark? episodes are my top five picks, in no particular order, are relatively safe to introduce to any of your youngsters who may want to tiptoe into the horror genre:
First up, The Tale of the Pinball Wizard: a teenage kid persuades a crotchety, pony tailed mall store owner to let him cover his lunch hour. The rebellious youth abandons his post, breaks one of the rules, goes behind the curtain, and plays the new, forbidden pinball machine. A persistent call bell brings him back to reality. DING-DING-DING! A customer! And not just any customer, a pretty teen girl! She asks if her gold throne music box is ready yet; he isn’t confident that it’s fixed, so she says she’ll come back later. The flashing, beeping game beckons to be played again, he indulges by inserting quarter after quarter, he loses track of time, and finds himself.. alone. The mall is dark and empty. Or so it seems.
Just as the teenager discovers he’s locked in, a faraway payphone rings, he scrambles to answer it, and a mysterious voice asks: “Got an umbrella?” With a flash, it begins to rain.. quarters! The nearby fountain is filled with silver. The greedy teen jumps in, ankles deep, and stuffs his pockets to feed his gaming addiction. All of a sudden, he notices a shady figure walk by.. are they friend or foe? Wouldn’t you like to know?!
Next, The Tale of the Midnight Madness: two teenagers work at a failing vintage movie theatre, where they reuse popcorn buckets, and soda cups. [Ewww..] One teen even starts a campaign to try and save the historical landmark. An hour before opening, a long gray haired, bearded, cloaked man who goes by Doctor Vink, a self-proclaimed former filmmaker, makes a proposition they cannot refuse as “it won’t cost them a dime.” If they show his unique, black and white, silent, vampire horror film, he promises that it will bring customers in by the droves! Once the theatre has assured success, his only request is that they show one of his other films one night a week. The manager half-heartedly agrees with a scoff. Sure enough, Doctor Vink’s prediction comes true, and the owners decide not to close due to its newfound success!
What happens when the disgruntled manager doesn’t honor the deal he made with Doctor Vink?! How does the silver screen villain invade the technicolor real world and terrorize the staff?! Who lives to tell the tale and sweep up the mess they didn’t make?!
Next, The Tale of Cutter’s Treasure: this two-part story is so major it’s told by the best of the Midnight Society members: Frank and Gary. A little behind the scenes fun fact: after four seasons, the AYAOTD creators quickly realized that two actors were too stupendous to appear in just one episode; therefore Sardo (played by Richard M. Dumont) and Doctor Vink (played by the late Aron Tager) became recurring characters in half a dozen episodes each.
Around the 17th century, a ruthless, greedy pirate’s ill-fated loot wreaks havoc into the next millennia to come; his relentless, evil spirit still guards his bountiful fortune. Magical mayhem meets two modern-day, feuding brothers who have a few tricks up their sleeves for this ancient villain. A teen is blackmailed into buying his pesky kid brother a magic set from a shop downtown so he can be left alone with his crush all weekend since their parents are out of town.
The kid brother keeps himself occupied by playing with a seemingly “busted” nautical spyglass that his older brother accidentally “won” by opening an “impossible” locked chest at the magic shop. The shop owner, Sardo, oddly pressures him to take home his “prize” because that was the chest owner’s explicit instructions: whoever opens the chest, must take all of its contents (not just the spyglass), so Sardo can collect his five thousand dollars.
The kid brother confesses to his older brother that the spyglass is possessed, spinning and rolling around on its own, and that a skeleton hand tried to pull him under the bed. The big brother doesn’t believe him and berates him for ruining his date. That night, big bro has a nightmare: he’s in a cemetery, he meets a wary ghost, and a skeleton hand touches his shoulder. This startles him awake. He looks through the spyglass once again and now he sees himself in the cemetery.. just like in his dream! Talk about déjà vu dude..
Big bro returns the spyglass to Sardo and runs away before the chest owner, Doctor Vink, expresses no concern about the boy’s departure. He instructs Sardo to send the boy to him when he returns and teases him with a large money roll as motivation to follow through.
The younger brother ventures into the night outside by their lake house, upon the dock, the nautical spyglass magically reappears; in the foggy distance, he sees a figure rowing a boat. Inside the lake house, big bro investigates a suspicious noise coming from the closet and finds an old piece of parchment stabbed into the door by a knife: “This is no dream. The boy is mine.” He runs outside to find his brother staring at a skeletal boat rower. Flesh grotesquely engulfs the rower’s body and threatens to take the boy. The brothers try to run away but they get cornered by the rower.. and his pirate pal. The spooky scallywags were true to their word, they took the little brother, and disappeared into the foggy night.
Just as Doctor Vink predicted, big bro went back to Sardo’s, which led him to the Doctor’s doorstep begging for help. A brief history lesson reveals that big bro is the descendant of the original chest owner who unsuccessfully tried to defeat the dreadful pirate. The contents of the chest were empowered by the victims’ souls: a spyglass, a dagger, and a rusted key; tools to help the “champion” fight this destined battle.
Doctor Vink leads big bro to the real cemetery that is shown inside the spyglass. Big bro is on his own, he’s armed with the tools, he uses the rusted key to unlock / enter the mausoleum, and falls down a trap door into a dark, overgrown tomb. By the skin of his teeth, he makes it through the booby-trapped maze into the pirate’s treasure room; where he finds his brother locked in a cage. The fired-up pirate ghost demands a grand battle! Ready or not, here he comes, sword-a-swinging!
How does the big brother escape: does he fight the pirate alone or does he gain unsuspecting allies?! Does he change his selfish ways and learn the importance of family?!
Next, The Tale of the Dead Man’s Float: it all started in 1954, a distracted, horny lifeguard neglects his duties, professionally, and brotherly. His tween brother was found at the bottom of the high school indoor swimming pool. Three deadly drownings later and the School Board closes the pool indefinitely. Forty-one years later, a chemistry geek strikes a deal with the popular swim team captain; tutoring sessions in exchange for swimming lessons. Sounds simple enough, except the nearest pool is an hour away. Or so they thought. They discover the long forgotten, hidden, closed pool, and successfully petition for it to be re-opened.
The ol’ timer custodian who saves the two teens from an overturned raft, confesses his lifeguard past, and offers a theory of the haunted pool: built over an old cemetery, an invisible, forgotten spirit seeks revenge on the living that disturbs its slumber. The chemistry geek devises a plan to unveil the putrid, impenetrable creature with none other than.. chemicals! Will the scholastic trio defeat the pool phantom or will their hare-brained scheme fail miserably like “Mystery Meat Mondays?!”
And last but certainly not least, The Tale of Station 109.1: two completely opposite brothers: the eldest is an aspiring mechanic doing odd jobs around town and this week’s project is a.. hearse! The youngest just so happens to be obsessed with.. death! He wears all black, sleeps in a suit and tie with his hands across his chest, surrounds his bedroom with candles and funeral floral wreaths that read: “Bon Voyage.” He even buries his shrimp dinner into an early mashed potato grave and tops it with a carrot cross.
As most siblings do, they like to pull pranks on one another; so the little bro takes the bait and ventures into the back of the hearse. And just as he’s laying comfortably, eyes closed, and solemnly reciting his own eulogy.. big bro locks him inside and jump starts the hearse to go haywire: windshield wipers going, horn honking, and radio tuning into.. “Station 109.1 radio for the dimensionally challenged.”
Little bro investigates this “new radio station” on his home computer, finds a last known address, and heads into town. He invites himself inside an unlocked rusty steel door and discovers a waiting room filled with people: some seated and others standing in line. Numbers eerily echo from an overhead speaker. The curious young fellow cuts to the front of the line, knocks on the window, and is startled to find a boisterous man pop out and scold him for knocking and skipping the line. He falls victim to the stereotypical case of “mistaken identity,” chaos ensues, and the final countdown begins! “Ever wonder where the term “your number’s up” came from?” He’s about to find out!
How does the little brother escape: does he go it alone or does his big bro come to the rescue?! Does he change his dark, macabre views on life and death?! Find out on a streaming service near you.. or if you’re feeling adventurous, take a road trip in a DeLorean to watch it LIVE on cable! Or if you’re feeling nostalgic, dust off that VCR, and pop in a SNICK VHS!
Be kind, rewind!
“The end. I declare this meeting of The Midnight Society closed [extinguishes the flames with a nearby pail of water].” Better book it home before your folks actually pay attention to the PSA: “It’s 10pm, do you know where your children are?” and find you outta bed!
Until next time, pleasant screams! HEY DUDE, it’s been totally unreal. Booyah! You’re ALL THAT and a bag of chips. As if! Ugh, talk to the hand. Sike! Peace out. Whatever.
‘Twas such an honor that Jaimie asked me to collaborate with him, again, on his creative project, Rob’s Video ‘zine! As I mentioned in my Vintage Trolling, Intergalactic Pals, Imaginary Frenemy, Sob Storyteller, and Booger Lips blog posts, we were originally inspired to create vintage good/bad movie posters whilst watching the documentary: 24×36: A Movie About Movie Posters (highly recommend). Jaimie decided to take the lead on the overall design of the movie poster, however I formatted the movie title, advertising slogan, and billing block. Per usual, we will not color this movie poster because we will eventually display it along with our other black and white movie posters in our living room as an interesting conversation piece for when people visit!
A Picture is Worth a Thousand-ish Words 