Tag: Psychological

Waiting for the Fog to Lift

Have you ever been in a funk that you can’t seem to shake? We’ve all been there. I’ve been in a funk ever since I returned from overseas. Jet-lag isn’t to blame as some of you may suspect. If it was, that’d have to be some serious jet-lag; considering we were only away for a week and have been back to the States for months! Haha..

In my Transformation post, I mentioned that I have intermittently utilized medication to help with my therapeutic process. Upon our return from the across the pond, my therapist and I decided it was time to revisit medication. I admit, it helps take the edge off my anxiety, which was at an all-time high. Dangerously high. It scared me. The new medication allows me to relax, and sleep comfortably; however, it has fogged my creativity. Being in this fog has affected my life in numerous ways. One of which is of course.. being able to write/create this blog. My boyfriend, Jaimie, suggested, more than once: “Just write about the fog!” It took some convincing. I pondered the idea for a while and thus.. this long overdue blog post was born! Welcome back readers/subscribers! I hope you missed me! As I have missed you all so! I’m curious if you had any theories as to where I went and what I was doing.. in lieu of writing. Please feel free to share any theories you may have had! I’d love to hear them!

I believe the winter weather has also contributed to my funk, the fog, and severe lack of motivation to be creative. I just want to curl up into a ball, under a pile of blankets, and hibernate until spring. I find myself sleeping more than usual (medication side effect), which has put the household chores on the back burner. Speaking of, I have a dirty pan literally on my back burner at home. Hey! At least I scraped the leftover egg particles out of it.. haha! No judgment. Oh! “No judgment” reminds me of my beloved Dance2Fit studio that closed last month. It was where I reignited my love of dance. I found my tribe of women friends there. It did hurt my soul not being able to attend as often as I would’ve liked since I moved an hour away.

I’ve gained quite a bit of weight since autumn, which has affected my self-esteem and confidence. Turns out that weight gain is also a side effect of the medication I am taking. I’ve modified my food choices and portions. At work, I try my best to stand at my desk as much as possible. Sometimes, I sneak in some squats and stretches too. I sit occasionally when my knees bother me. I walk around the office to complete various tasks throughout my workday. I think every little bit helps, for sure.

I’m in the process of looking into a new studio to dance at. Exercise must be a fun activity so I can trick myself into staying active and becoming more fit. I think I’ve narrowed it down to one fitness center that has a little bit of everything: various group fitness classes, which include dance and yoga (I’ll be attending these, maybe try some others), exercise equipment, and my favorite: massage machines to help relieve sore muscles after working out! Oh! I can bring a workout buddy for free, however they have to pay for the classes, if that’s what they want to do. All the other perks are available for them. I’m sure my boyfriend, Jaimie, will be utilizing their treadmills when it’s too cold or too hot outside. I don’t blame him. Hell, I don’t even run! If you ever do see me running, something is chasing me, and you should run too!

I’ve been spending a lot of time with my new Little from Big Brothers Big Sisters. We hang out once a week for a couple hours. She’s a quiet, shy little nine-year-old, which is fine by me because I talk enough for the both of us! Haha.. I try to change it up every week: physical activity, arts and crafts, board games, culinary, theatrical, educational, volunteer, etc. I thoroughly enjoy volunteering, BBBS included, however I’m looking forward to sharing that with my Little. We’re due to volunteer at a food pantry soon. This may be her first volunteering experience. She mentioned at the beginning of the year that she has a 2020 Goal of reading twenty chapter books, so I added a trip to the library once a month so I can help her achieve her goal! I’m a bookworm, so this adjustment to our scheduled activities doesn’t bother me a bit! I did support/accompany her (and her family) when she ran a 5K for Girls on the Run. Her mom and I walked that, haha! We’ve attended a couple BBBS sponsored events, which are nice because they’re free! Free is always good. We met another Big and Little at these BBBS events and we recently had an arts and crafts play date. The girls seem to enjoy spending time together. They’re complete opposites and there’s a couple years difference between them. Guess opposites attract! I should know because I think we’re a good Big/Little match! Kudos to our BBBS Match Support Specialist! I highly recommend volunteering for BBBS nearest you! It is rewarding and fun!

There was a health scare in my family that did put things in perspective for me about how every day of life is precious. My dad had to have his left kidney removed, which was scary because we weren’t sure if his body would adapt to operate with one kidney or if he would need to be put on dialysis. He’s recently retired from twenty-five years of service driving for a transportation company (fifty years in the workforce). He transported mentally and/or physically disabled, elderly, dialysis patients, etc. He may have been in his clients’ shoes. I’m happy to report he is doing well post-surgery! I’m glad that my mom is retired as well so they can keep each other company. Oh! They did recently get another dog, so their dog now has a playmate. This makes my heart happy because he really did need a buddy to run around and play with in their large backyard.

Speaking of playmates, Jaimie and I recently got another cat, so our cat, Hex, has some company while we’re away at work. She had separation anxiety issues when we would leave every day. She would get sick and tear up the carpet. It took time for them to adjust to one another. Our new cat, Hairy Houdini, is a lot younger and more kitten than cat. He’s very playful and rambunctious. Complete opposite of Hex. They tolerate each other at best. There were hierarchical issues when it came to food, however she has reclaimed her role as Alpha and he is the Beta. I’m happy to report that Hex has not gotten sick or torn up the carpet as often as she used to, so I consider this as a win! She has been too distracted with chasing/bullying him around that she’s forgotten how anxious she was about being separated from us. I must admit, I’ve transformed into a cat lady. I enjoy snuggling my cats and being a homebody. Toss in a good book and tune in to WMKV 89.3FM.. and I’m content for hours!

Another thing that affected my motivation, mood, and creativity was having a life-changing adventure with Jaimie in London and Amsterdam. We had so much fun together exploring, spending real quality time together, and experiencing a lot of firsts together; that when the trip ended and we came home to reality.. it deeply affected me. We’re both empathetic people so we kind of fed off one another and kept asking each other: “What’s the matter?” We concluded that we were inadvertently bringing one another down. We believe things will lighten up a bit when we start planning our next vacation. We decided to add a couple mini vacations or weekend road trips in between to keep ourselves in check. We desperately crave something to look forward to. Time away from work. We need that work, play, life balance. We are both consumed with wanderlust!

I took the two above photos of a vulture on a roof and flying off awhile ago when I was entering my office building one foggy morning. I noticed the vulture’s intense concentration: waiting for the opportune moment to fly. I’m sure it had an internal, instinctual checklist: adjust for the wind’s speed and direction, factor in visibility per foggy conditions, and be clear of all air traffic obstacles. I edited the two photos into one photo, edited their shape into ovals, added a blur effect on the edges, and adjusted to fifty percent transparency to exaggerate the fog. I tend to edit photos individually and then post them as a single image within WordPress, however this process seems to be better. I did utilize Microsoft PowerPoint this time around. I’ve previously used the application called Polish (on my Android smartphone) to edit photos quickly. If any of you follow me on social media (Facebook or Instagram), I post an announcement photo that somehow relates to my weekly blog post. This week’s announcement photo just makes me giggle! Feel free to check it out!

I was anxious to publicly share my ongoing internal struggles after this long of a hiatus, however, am glad I got back up on the horse; in more ways than one! I admire and respect those who’ve been knocked down but refuse to give up. I hope the next time you feel stuck in your head and you just can’t seem to shake it; that you’ll take the time to seek the help you deserve, whichever avenue you choose: therapy, medication, exercise, meditation, diet, etc. Trust that you are not alone. Please share your foggy stories in the comments. I’m interested to hear about them! We can help and support each other in our trying times.

Black Leather Jacket

WordPress decided to publish my blank draft last week when I tried to delete it, therefore I apologize for the tease! If you are a subscriber, you gotta sneak peek of the post title and I’m sure you’ve been mulling over the mystery of it: “Black Leather Jacket.” What does it mean?! Well, you’ll soon find out. As you may have noticed, I’ve been M.I.A. for more than a couple weeks now. Life has been kinda hectic: traveling, recovering, surgery, and recovering.. AGAIN! Haha.. Alright, let’s get to it!

This was my first time across the pond to London and Amsterdam! My boyfriend, Jaimie, and I had a grand time! One of our first stops was at Green Park. We popped a squat in one of their lawn chairs under a tree and watched people walk, jog, congregate, read, etc. This gentleman below to the right was reading and smoking, which seemed odd, however I did notice quite a few smokers in Europe. We did find out at dusk, at a different park, that these chairs are “rentals,” however didn’t see any signage. So, you’ve been warned!

Weather was perfect. ‘Twas so peaceful!

Parks, parks, and more parks! Nature everywhere…

We were those stereotypical tourists; we saw Buckingham Palace! Lounging at Victoria Memorial

We discovered an interesting tree along the walk path so we decided to explore it!

Sir James Barrie Peter Pan statue in the Italian Gardens

On our way to our Air BnB in Kensington, I noticed a row of Doctor Strange-esque buildings, better known as the Sanctums. Not really, but I’m sure these could’ve been inspirational architecture pieces for the comics and/or films. A lot of buildings are shotgun style with multiple levels as different residences. I did occasionally peer down into people’s makeshift patios, which were quite cute with AstroTurf, hammocks, potty pads for their pets.

I saw a poster that read: “H-Town & Friends,” which reminded me of my hometown because the locals have given it the nickname: “H-Town,” so I felt right at home. Come to find out this poster was promoting an upcoming concert for an R&B band called H-Town. They’re from the States. Houston, Texas to be exact, so now we know what the “H” stands for. Haha! Guess my hometown isn’t so original. Just like Cin City. Cincinnati didn’t get the memo about Vegas.

I’ve always found the European red telephone booth the ultimate Kodak moment as a tourist, however in this day of age with mobile phones and telephone booths becoming obsolete aka non-functional, but still around for nostalgic purposes. I found it humorous that the phone booth that we passed regularly to catch the Tube (the subway to you bloody Yanks) was literally inoperable because the receiver was missing and there were exposed wires just dangling about.

Perspective has multiple meanings: literally and figuratively. The European architecture was something to be in awe of with each step we took around the city. I truly believe travel enriches your character, cleanses your soul, and opens your heart for new opportunities and adventures! It feels nice, yet terrifying, to be reminded that we are yet a speck in the universe.

Unfortunately, Big Ben was under construction so.. I was pretty bummed because I specifically wore my red, white, blue and black cut film t-shirt of Big Ben just for this outing! Oh well.. Things happen. Jaimie and I enjoyed strolling across the London bridge (unsure if this is the “official” London Bridge or just a random London Bridge, haha). We decided to have lunch at a burger joint Jaimie had eaten at a couple years ago during his first trip to London. It did not disappoint! It was nicely shaded, ideal for people watching, and with a waterfront view to boot!

The Eye was massive! It rotated/moved like molasses. We did not go up on it because it seemed overpriced to wait in a wicked long line and slowly go around. It was an interesting piece in the London skyline because it could be seen all around at different sights. If you look closely, in the last photo in the Buckingham Palace collage, you can see The Eye, vaguely, in the background behind the trees!

The Natural History Museum was classically grand! The exhibits were spread out, which helped move along traffic because every museum we went to was packed! Jaimie told me later that all the London museums were free, so it made sense. We ducked into a museum whenever it started raining for a couple hours. It worked out. If you have cable and the Travel Channel, I highly recommend checking out the show called Mysteries at the Museum. It’s one of my favorite educational shows! I could watch it for hours, they do have marathons on the weekends, which is amazing!

Oh! I just had to get a photo with the Easter Island head sculpture at the British Museum (or better known as the Moai) because I love the movie Night at the Museum. The scene where the Moai calls Ben Stiller’s character a Dum Dum and requests he bring him some Gum Gum, cracks me up!

Besides museums, another must for Jaimie is to go to as many comic shops as possible. We went to Gosh Comics multiple times, highly recommend! At Forbidden Planet, we noticed a Stranger Things “Visions from the Upside Down” Art Book signing poster as we were descending the stairs to the lower level. This was such a coincidence because Jaimie is one of the 200 artists featured in the book! If we had only known, we could’ve planned our trip better and he could’ve signed some copies while we were there! Feel free to follow Jaimie on Instagram here, purchase some of his bad-ass art here, and listen to his comic book podcast called Comics Rule Everything Around Me (C.R.E.A.M.) here.

This Barber Shop definitely caught my attention with their rad neon light: “You’re so f*cking Soho.” I mean, I would get my ears lowered here! There were multiple signs that sparkled, which I initially thought were digital screens flashing, however.. they were simple circular sequins pinned to a board moving in the breeze! Clever, inexpensive, and effective advertising design. Jaimie and I shared a celebratory kiss on a Double Decker bus because I happily checked riding in one off my Bucket List. We sat up top, in the front row! I was worried that maybe riding in a double decker was going to be overrated like it was when we rode in a San Franciscan trolley last year, but it wasn’t! I thoroughly enjoyed seeing the sights and traveling at the same time. Luckily, the Oyster card can be used for both the tube and the bus. Aw, look at us.. Sweetly snogging at Snog dessert parlor. I don’t scream for ice cream.. I swing for ice cream!

The moment you’ve been waiting for! I’ve kept you in anticipation long enough.. The meaning behind this post’s title: “Black Leather Jacket” is because every other European I saw wore a.. Black leather jacket! It became a game to me, similar to when I see a dog in public, I stop mid-sentence and say: “Dog!” But during this trip, I changed it up and whispered: “Leather jacket” to Jaimie every two seconds. When we saw this Leather Garments shop, I just had to take a photo of it and share it with y’all.

Camden Market is partially underground, it was originally a set of horse stalls; now turned market shops. Oh! The public toilets in London.. Fun fact: you gotta pay approximately 40 pence to use, no change given, so I recommend collecting all the change ya can for such pit stops.

We had lunch at a very busy, happenin’, and delicious joint called: Dirty Vegan. We lucked out and got a high top table in the middle of the open restaurant so we were able to watch people outside walking by. At one of the many shops, I snapped a photo of some Punky Brewster style apparel that reminded me of something I would totally wear when I was a kid.

Jaimie’s favorite photo of me.. thus far, haha.. I felt one with the people.. finally.. I just had to represent my love of Elton John in London with my RocketMan t-shirt (highly recommend the movie, by the way). This was the first time during the entire trip that I felt appropriately dressed (considering other places we went, the locals wore plain or patterned clothing). I’m sure I felt more comfortable there because the people were mostly tourists and they had graphic tees on too. I like to think some Europeans like graphic tees too! Maybe? Who knows.. If any readers are European, please comment and let me know! I just gotta know..

We ate lunch on the second floor of Ichibuns overlooking rainy Chinatown in Soho London. Packaged magazines covered the walls in a detailed, stylized pattern. Anime figurines lined the top shelves around the dining room. My go to Asian menu items are: edamame, sushi, and hot (temperature, not spicy) sake. It was lovely to feel a gentle, misty, cool breeze through the open windows while sipping some steaming sake on a rainy day.

I noticed the lanterns align almost perfectly across the first and second photos after I arranged them in the tiled gallery style. How cool is that?! “We don’t make mistakes, just happy little accidents.” -Bob Ross. You’re so right, Bob, thank you for your creative wisdom!

Next stop: Amsterdam! We decided to fly instead of taking a train simply because time was of the essence (1hr flight vs a several hour train ride) and the cost was pretty much the same. The Amsterdam Schiphol airport had these cool bicycle booths sprinkled throughout their food court. I did find something odd; right smack dab in the middle of the food court was a.. Yotel. It does make sense to be close to food for immediate room service. Maybe it’s simply take-away. Uber Eats? Door Dash? Haha..

Fun fact: no balloons allowed in the airport or tube. I’m sure there’s an interesting story behind how this rule came about. Maybe a clown ruined IT for the rest of us? “We all float down here” eerily echos from the tube stairwell.

I found the tube in Amsterdam to be slower paced than the busy, bustling city of London (I have multiple theories, haha, as I’m sure you do too). I noticed a lot of interesting and creative details while we waited. The metallic insect cut outs crawling along the wall and ceiling. Oh, how the sunlight shone on and through them! The outdoor semi-domed skylight was a nice touch for admiring clouds, sun, birds flying, planes soaring, etc while being sheltered from the elements. I was surprised it was so clean and not speckled with bird poop. Oh! The fold-able bicycle. This blew my mind! But.. it makes sense because the Dutch do love their bicycles, which leads me to the last photo: the phallic and bulging bicycle seat.

The Albert Cuyp Market is the largest open air market in Europe! Highly recommend! We just had to get an XXL stroopwafel because they’re a Dutch delicacy! Oh, yes, just trust me on this one, place one over your hot coffee cup (tea or chocolate); let the hot beverage warm the stroopwafel, flip it and eat it. You’ll thank me later. Check out these fashionable bum bags! You can’t say f*nny packs here, it’s a naughty word. Yep, click here to find out why. Adorable little botanical jellyfish. Adorably dope, Italian, sweepeh kitteh on a bench. I mean.. c’mon! Too adorable.

We had the best lunch at Sonny’s Falafel and Vlaamse Frites! Highly recommend. Cute little mom and pop joint where the staff gives ya a hard time with a smile. Makes ya feel just like family. I tried my best to read and speak Dutch when I ordered. The lady stifled a laugh, I asked if I pronounced word(s) incorrectly, she quickly said: “Close enough.” We both chuckled. Jaimie was sitting at a table nearby watching our backpacks. When our orders were ready, the lady shouted at Jaimie to come and fix his falafel because he needed to work too. She winked at me. He was apprehensive because he didn’t want to leave our stuff unattended. She shook her head at him and confidently said with a wave: “Your stuff is fine, come fix your food.” Fun fact: the Dutch serve mayonnaise with their chips (fries to you Yanks)! There was a mother and young son having lunch at the table next to us. He was about seven or eight years old. After they finished eating, he decided to sit on his mom’s lap. The lady who served us shouted: “Aww, wittle baby on his mummy’s lap!” So precious. I enjoyed their sense of humor and banter.

The National Flower of the Netherlands is the Tulip. The National Footwear of the Netherlands is the Clog. Not really, haha..

We stayed in a little, quiet, quaint city called Weesp (pronounced Veesp). Cute little shops along the water, bicyclists everywhere, and the friendliest vibes. The best I can describe Weesp is like a European Mayberry. Our Air BnB was unbelievably breathtaking! I would live there in a heartbeat. It was above a flower shop with a gorgeous floor to ceiling window, but I don’t know if I’d call it a “window” per se. Just admire the view. Oh, how I miss it!

Museumplein Park near Van Gogh Museum, paint brush chandelier, the Smartest car, interesting angles, skylights, staircases, and a fancy tunnel

We visited the Red Light District! I didn’t know much about the Red Light District before we went, which is usually how I prefer to go into things, haha.. How Jaimie and I mutually described it in one word: B-A-N-A-N-A-S! I highly suggest clicking on the hyperlink to learn more about the RLD, simply because you’ll understand why I’m being incredibly vague and why there aren’t a lot of photos.. even though this was my favorite part of the trip!

In the fourth photo, top middle open window, you can see a pair of barefeet dangling out. I’m sure that person is higher than the third story! What do you think? I’ll bet ol’ Mary Jane had too many brownies.

We did manage to squeeze in some museum time.. at a naughty yet natural themed: Sex Museum. I only took one photo because I thought it’d be funny if I had dish platters like these; I would serve them at a party, as my guests devoured the food and revealed the illustrations, I’d find their reactions priceless and giggle like a school girl!

Jaimie and I discovered a tour group.. in the Red Light District.. (yeah, I know), which we found extremely odd, so of course it peaked our interest and we just had to stop and listen for a minute. The tour guide was speaking in front of a barber shop. A plump cat sat in the open doorway. The tour guide stated that feral cats are treated very well in Amsterdam because they help exterminate river rats, which is why they’re so fat and well fed. Store owners welcome them into their businesses. Kind of a quid pro quo deal. As she was speaking, she leaned down to pet the cat and it angrily smacked her hand several times. She quickly withdrew her hand and laughed it off in front of her tour group. I asked: “Did it scratch ya?!” She replied: “Oh, no!” But I noticed she quickly put her hand in her pocket, so I’m sure it did get her. That smug cat confidently stalked out of that barber shop, into the street, and down an alley like it owned the Red Light District. Man, that alley cat had style! I knew I had to get an alley photo in here somewhere! An alley cat in an alley, oh, yes! Score.

I hope the next time you’re planning a trip, especially international, that you’ll take some extra time and effort to learn, appreciate and adapt to their customs! Who knows? Maybe you’ll pick up how to speak Dutch easily and be fluent in no time! Please follow me on Instagram or Facebook to see more photos and videos of our trip! I’d love to hear about any/all of your international travels! I’m sure the other readers would too!

Throwback Thursday #TBT

My boyfriend and I are currently across the pond vacationing in London and Amsterdam! I’ve prepared a Throwback Thursday blog post in advance to keep on schedule for all my readers to enjoy. Throwback Thursday is a popular internet trend used among social media platforms. Users will often post nostalgic pictures of their past accompanied by the hashtag #TBT or Throwback Thursday. It is used by people all over the world to share and relive their past experiences with anyone they want. While most posts reflect positive moments in someone’s past, the term throwback can be attributed to anything in the past.

“…You have a unique view of things and you are able to express it well. Just saw a recent post from you and it “triggered” fond memories, especially your graduation speech which was brilliant!..” -My college professor stated when he suggested that I write.

Good evening ladies, gentlemen, and the graduates of the class of 2008. It is an honor to be here speaking before you all. I would like to start off by thanking the academic team/staff for nominating me to speak. It was quite a surprise when Mark Harris pulled me out of class and delivered the news. Or rather ordering the news: “I’m going to make you an offer that you cannot refuse!” Yessir, (salutes) anything you say, Yoda! And here I am.

And here we are, college graduates! “We’ve been waiting for our dreams to turn into something we could believe in.” Each of us took a risk in pursuing our education, especially in the arts. I’m proud to say that we’ve overcome the starving artist stereotype! Even though it may have taken two, three, four years to receive a two-year degree, so be it! I’m proud all the same. The bottom line is we started something, followed through, and achieved our goal of graduating.

Looking back at the last three years, I came across an entry in my journal. “I feel so grateful to be back in college, pursuing my education again. I’m months behind, not going to graduate in August of 2007. So what? I’ve realized you cannot live your life according to plan! No matter how hard you try, wish, or pray. Life is unpredictable! Be thankful for who and what you have and all the blessings in between.”

When I first sat down to write this speech, I decided to channel surf to find some background noise. Coincidentally, I decided on the movie, Tommy Boy. There’s a scene between Chris Farley and David Spade that I could relate to:

“Did you hear I finally graduated?”
“Yeah, just a shade under a decade too. Alright!”
“You know a lot of people go to college for seven years.”
“I know. They’re called doctors.”

I know we’re not doctors, but I know we have mastered our craft to the best of our ability. The time, effort, and dedication we put into our profession I know will come back to us ten fold. Our creativity will touch the lives of others in the most colorful way.

To my classmates in all the present majors: I thank you for simply setting the tone at our school. Making everyone feel welcome and never hesitating to lend a helping hand. I think our generosity comes from wanting to go up against the best of the best even though we are each other’s competition. I am proud to go out into the art world and play ball!

To the Ai Instructors: thank you for passing us! Most of all, thank you for educating our young creative minds to be the best artists we can be.
My cap’s off to you! I mean that figuratively because otherwise I’d mess up my do.

Many of us have faced challenges while being in school, big and small. Whether it be financial drawbacks, health issues, gas prices, work/school conflicting schedules, among other endless sacrifices. No matter, we surpassed our own expectations. Remember every cloud has a silver lining.

To all of our friends and family: thank you for understanding that we had to put our schooling first before anything else. It paid off, look at where it got us! It got us in these over-sized, red gowns. I’m sure the Fashion Merchandising graduates are thinking: “Hurry up so I can get out of this thing! I wanna show off my new outfit underneath!” Better yet, how about thinking more hands on. Re-invent and update the graduation gowns! Ha, I should’ve gone for a double major!

As we go our separate ways this evening, I wish you all the best. I hope each and every one of you make your mark in the art world. “Remember, this is the time to be more than a name or a face in the crowd. You know this is the time of our lives!” Keep in touch and take care.

*Quotations taken from David Cook’s song “Time of My Life” written by Regie Hamm. **Hilarity taken from the brilliant mind of Allison Hibbard written by yours truly © All rights reserved.

My speech was approximately 668 words which equaled to a little over 5 minutes of speaking time with an average 130 spoken words per minute. I really was surprised that I was voted to be the student guest speaker at graduation by my college’s faculty. Out of all the majors. Years later when I received another degree at the same college, they decided to change it so one student from each major would be voted as a guest speaker. I guess to spread the love. They did the same thing for awarding Best in Show at the Portfolio Show before graduation: initially it was one student who won per faculty votes, then years later they awarded a Best in Show for each major, which I did receive!

I received a standing ovation
My college professor and I
I was presented flowers from the
Ai Faculty for giving my speech

I hope the next time you find yourself strolling down memory lane, that you’ll be able to recall each consequential moment that lead you there. I guarantee you’ll learn how all of those moments helped shape your life to where it is now! Please share any special #TBT achievements in the comments! I’d love to hear about them! I’m sure the other readers would too!

Weekends are for Road Trips

Three-day weekends are made for road trips. This past holiday weekend was just a practice run for my boyfriend and I’s international trip coming up. Our first stop was to North Market for lunch. I ordered the Pho with chicken (or Phở gà) at Lan Viet. Pho is their specialty. Some people pronounce the “o” as long, however the origin of Pho’s true pronunciation is “fuh.” This fun fact always makes me laugh because there’s a local restaurant called “Pho Kimmy,” which sounds like an explicit phrase when pronounced correctly.

North Market

Normally, I’m not a fan of putting together pieces of my food into a completed dish, however I rather enjoy adding the bean sprouts and mixing in Sriracha to a comfortable spice level! I specifically avoid ordering fajitas because I don’t like having to work for my food. That’s the whole reason why I go to a restaurant.. for someone else to prepare my food for me! Haha..

Jim Henson Exhibit at Cosi Museum

My boyfriend and I tentatively plan to dress up as Beaker and Bunsen for Halloween! I scored us a couple lab coats from when I volunteered at a Greenlight for Girls event at the University of Cincinnati this past spring. I’ve written a list of pop culture duos we could dress up as where one character has a mohawk and one is bald. Bunsen and Beaker are next on the list! Well.. Beaker doesn’t really have a mohawk. More like a little fluff. I could mess up my mohawk to match. Oh! By the way, I scored that jean overalls + floral dress at Wally World.. in the kids section.. for a whole seven dollars!

These two are adorable! Epic comical duo. Bunsen is the intellectual brain and Beaker is the fluent Gibberish speaking, accident prone assistant. Seems to be fitting for my boyfriend and I! Jaimie is well spoken and bright. I tend to fall walking upstairs, trip over my own feet, and have numerous mysterious bruises all over my body.

This piece reminded me of my last week’s post of inanimate objects with faces. Initially, I thought this may have inspired the creation and/or design of Gonzo! He’s a silly Muppet character, whose sidekick is Rizzo the Rat. These two are a complimentary, hilarious pair in Muppet Treasure Island and Muppet Christmas Carol, which I own on.. VHS!

There was a plaque below it that read:
“Pitchman Pump puppets, 1963: These unusual puppets were built for a Marathon Gasoline commercial in 1963 and were voiced by professional jingle singers rather than puppeteers.“
I was kind of disappointed the plaque didn’t state what I was hoping about the hoses leading to a Muppet character.

When Jaimie and I exited the Cosi Museum and descended the steps, I noticed burn marks on the concrete. They reminded me of shooting stars or meteors, which seemed to be fitting considering astronomy played a part of the educational exhibits inside.. a few light-years away!

While strolling through town, we were waiting at a red light and saw a man and his hound going through a crosswalk in front of us. I wasn’t sure what type of breed this dog was. I did manage to snap a photo. I simply Googled: “large gray dog breed” and immediately discovered it was an Irish wolfhound! The American Kennel Club (AKC) specifies the minimum height as 32 inches (81 cm) for mature males, 30 inches (76 cm) for females; the minimum weight: 120 pounds (54 kg) for males, 105 pounds (48 kg) for females. It was surprising to find out that this dog could have easily weighed as much as.. me! Which isn’t saying much.. haha!

Jaimie always finds a comic bookstore wherever we travel to. We found a hole in the wall comic bookstore called Heroes and Games at Columbus’ convention center. It did have a lot of good finds, on sale at that! Jaimie and his buddy, Iann, do a podcast about comics called Comics Rule Everything Around Me (C.R.E.A.M.). I highly recommend y’all check it out.. click here! When we were exiting the convention center, I noticed this whimsical, colorful mural that was abstractly detailed. What do you see? What kind of world is this? What story is it telling?

As we turned a corner, this tall building caught my eye! I had never seen an exterior elevator before! I’m sure the view was amazing. I’m claustrophobic therefore not a fan of elevators, but with this one being mostly glass with a view to boot.. I’m sure I’d enjoy the ride! Have you ridden on an exterior elevator before? If you have, where? I’d love to hear about it!

Pastaria

We ended our trip as we began it and went back to North Market for dinner! Yep, you guessed it.. I’m a fan of this place! I decided to try an Italian joint this time. They have a pasta sauce testing station. I highly recommend the spicy ones! They have a variety of pasta styles such as: penne, striped ravioli, multi-colored tortellini; including whole wheat and/or gluten free options! Choice of protein or vegetables. They have a smorgasbord of sides. I’ve tried their stuffed banana peppers and cucumber/tomato/mozzarella salad. Both are delish!

I hope the next time you’re out and about, especially when exploring new territory, that you’ll be inspired to take more weekend road trips! Who knows? Maybe you’ll start your own weekend road trips photo collection. If you do, please follow me on Instagram or send me a Facebook friend request and share them on my page! I’d love to see them! I’m sure the other readers would too! And as always, I’m more than happy to give you my travel spot recommendations.

Let’s Play “I Spy”

  • Look to your left
  • Look to the right
  • Look in front of you
  • Look up
  • Look down
  • Look behind you
    • BOO!
    • Gotcha!
    • Haha..

Find anything interesting? What would you choose as your “I Spy” object? Think about why you chose that. Really examine it. Get as close as you can to see it in detail. I prefer to choose an unusual yet specific object when I play “I Spy” because I’m competitive. I like to set the bar in hopes that my opponent will step it up when it’s their turn, so the game will become more challenging as we go. I’m sure it’s been awhile since you’ve last played “I Spy,” I know it has for me! Playing games aren’t just for kids.. I mean, think about it..

Whilst playing any of the above games, I would usually find faces in inanimate objects! Do you see faces too? One of the first memories I have of seeing an inanimate object face was when I would jump up and down on my parents bed and watch myself on their huge vanity mirror. They have this glass ceiling light fixture with blue accent shapes.. and the blue accent shapes look like an angry face! It was kinda symbolic of the “strict” no jumping on the bed rule that my folks rarely enforced. I did enjoy singing “No More Monkeys Jumping on the Bed” while.. jumping on the bed; I was such a rebel! The bottom center three flowers are the eyes and nose. The curved line is a sly smile. The top flowers are its wild, frizzy hair.

“I see you.. misbehaving!”

Another one of my early memories I had seeing an inanimate object face was in my childhood home bathroom. Below the sink, the bottom right cabinet door’s wood grain looks like a cloaked pig chief holding a staff while addressing his tribe. Do you see a pig? The snout is distinctly pronounced. Its tongue is perfectly shaped inside its open mouth. Pointed ear, enlarged eye, and I think this swine was reincarnated as a tree!

“Oink oink my fellow hogs!”

Another cardinal rule in my house growing up was: no playing with your food! I never did well abiding by rules.. I was a little stinker! I dare you to ask my parents about the spaghetti slinging incident! Oh, it was infamous. Anywho.. I do like how my food makes silly faces at me! The photo below has a Tupperware lid making impressions: two eyes and an open mouth. Maybe it’s shouting at me. What do you think my mashed potatoes would say if it could?

“Have a spud-tacular day!”

Even when I eat out at a restaurant.. My food speaks to me! My garden salad remnants decided to make a silly face at me in its shallow lemon dressing. I highly recommend Kinneret Grill! The sampler is to die for! If you’re not stingy, it’s enough for two people, haha.. Their vegan shawarma is the best faux meat I’ve ever had! Oh, their maple glazed sweet potato fries.. are delish! Everything is made fresh, large portions for a decent price, and I thoroughly enjoy the hospitable atmosphere!

“Lettuce pray.. Olive you!”

While visiting a friend of mine at her house, I noticed her little space heater was winking and smiling at me! See how the knobs are different and the red light is the tongue? Oh, and the indentation of the plastic makes a smile. Whoever designs these machines must be having a good ol’ time!

On a road trip years ago, I photographed a bathroom dispenser because it reminded me of The Brave Little Toaster movie and its secondary character, Air Conditioner, (voiced by Phil Hartman). I combined the two photos into one per Android’s collage feature so I could see the resemblance side by side! This movie seemed to inspire Disney to create.. Toy Story! Similar concept, but kids relate more to their toys than household appliances, so I understand why one’s more popular than the other. Do you find yourself telling inanimate objects to: “Stay!” when they’re about to fall? I need to know I’m not alone.. Please tell me you do the same thing!

One day when I was a kid, my girlfriend and I were stuck hanging out at her uncle’s job at Rent-a-Center. We setup camp on an extra large sectional couch with our Burger King Cini-Minis and milk. Every TV played The Mask, on a loop, for his entire eight hour shift! One particular scene (1:38-2:48) was where I first learned about the Rorschach test. This later inspired my abstract painting style.. with a twist. I specifically painted my nude body and then imprinted myself onto the canvas. I tried to make it as symmetrical as possible, except for the random splatters to fill the negative space. This is a good conversation piece when guests visit. They tend to blush more than I do!

What do you see?

An illustrator I admire is Hanoch Piven; he works with mixed media to create colorful, witty portraits. He is best known for his celebrity caricatures. He uses everyday objects and arranges them to hint at their identity. I created my own little portrait with a water bottle, some googly eyes, a Lisa Frank lip sticker, & Silly Putty. All of these items are in my office desk drawer! You can tell that I don’t like meetings because I get lost in my own world.

I must ox you a question.

I hope the next time you’re playing a game or daydreaming, that you’ll be inspired to take a moment to examine the details.. such as inanimate objects that look like faces! Who knows? Maybe you’ll start your own faces photo collection. If you do, please follow me on Instagram or send me a Facebook friend request and share them on my page! I’d love to see them! I’m sure the other readers would too!

Living the Dream

Perhaps it was a dream, she thought. Perhaps if she pinched herself, she would wake up. But she didn’t want to wake up. She wanted to stay in this dream world where pain didn’t exist. Where she could soar and fly with the rest of the flock. Where her wings never tired. She could do whatever her heart desired. Sure, she overlooked her random encounter with an overly chatty walrus named Wallace over a bowl of sea salted peanuts at a Tiki Bar. She knows this is a dream, but she’d rather stay here forever if she could. She felt an urgent pressure all of a sudden, which woke her up from her pleasant yet odd slumber. The pressure was a.. full bladder. Nature calls. Her body decided it was time to get up. Mhmm.. there’s the pain she didn’t miss. Living with chronic widespread pain is something she wouldn’t wish on her worst enemy.. if she had any.

Mildred was well liked and respected in her small retirement community, however she felt disconnected since she recently became a widow. She’s always been a homebody. She frequently seeks refuge in her colorful, wild garden and quaint in-ground pool. The warm weather does wonders for her mood and productivity. She smiled with her eyes still closed as the Florida sun crept through the fuchsia curtains upon her tan face. As she stretched and rolled over, her smile widened because her emotional support Goldendoodle, Rover, greeted her with a slobbery kiss and zoomed around the bedroom.

“Guess it’s officially time to get up outta bed and start the day, huh?” Mildred finally opened her eyes and giggled as Rover whined at her. She opened the floor length curtains to a picturesque view of her backyard that was littered with nature: squirrels, birds, insects, daisies, carnations, rhododendrons, Big Beef tomato plants, and orange citrus trees. She sighed with pride and opened the sliding door. She walked outside with Rover, who chased the critters about and hiked against a stone bird bath under a Weeping Willow. She took a deep breath in and out, closed her eyes, and quietly counted: “One. Two. Three. F- – -.”

“Good morning Milly! How ya doing?” Rosalee cheerfully announced with a wave from the other side of the white picket fence. Her enthusiastic motion almost knocked her large sun hat off her petite head.

“Morning Rose! Oh, ya know.. I’m.. living the dream,” Mildred fibbed. “How about you? Your petunias sure do look beautiful!”

“Ain’t we all,” Rosalee gleefully gestured with both arms wide holding pruning shears in one hand and a batch of plucked weeds in the other. “I woke up this morning so I’m doing grand,” she chuckled lightly. “Thank you! Just trying to keep up with your green thumb!”

“Aw, Rose! You’re doing great! Keep it up. How are your lemons coming along this year?”

“Thanks Milly! I learned from the best,” Rosalee brushed aside some gray strands of hair from her freckled face and winked. “Ya know if Spike would leave the dang tree alone, there’d be a couple shoots by now and we could share a glass of lemonade!” They both cackled. Her three-year-old gray Great Dane galloped along with Rover and they gave each other an Eskimo kiss between the fence panels. Ya know how they say dogs and their owners look alike? That’s Rosalee and Spike. Gray haired, gentle, and practically the same height!

Mildred’s wavy golden gray hair did happen to resemble Rover’s. They recently celebrated his ninth birthday with all the cul-de-sac doggies, which makes him sixty-three in dog years so they’re more alike than she originally thought! She descended the wooden deck stairs to join Rover, Spike, and Rosalee. A ladybug landed on her fluffy floral fleece robe sleeve.

“Wow, look here, Rose! A ladybug!” Mildred lifted her arm to get a better look at the spotted insect.

“Milly, did you know that when a ladybug lands on you.. it’ll bring you luck?!”

“I have heard that before.. Jeepers.. I’m overdue for some luck!”

“Me and you both,” Rosalee teased. “Mind sharing that lucky ladybug? I hope some of its good juju will rub off on me too.” Rosalee reached out her wrinkly hand over the white picket fence to retrieve the insect. Mildred carefully stepped into her garden’s mulched area, in between a couple plants, and noticed another little garden critter, a snail; it seemed perfectly content in the middle of the chaotic garden as it took it’s morning stroll. As quickly as the ladybug crawled off Mildred’s arm onto Rosalee’s delicate hand; it fluttered away just as swiftly. They both watched the ladybug fly off until it disappeared into the distance.

“Goodness gracious, look at that,” Mildred pointed up. “Not a cloud in the sky, but you can bet your bottom dollar we’re going to get a Floridian rain shower sometime this afternoon!”

“But of course! Sure saves me having to water my garden every day. Saves me money on the water bill too. I’m glad and grateful that Mother Nature steps in and picks up the slack for me!”

“You said it, Rose,” Mildred sighed and then flinched because a nearby bird splashed her on the ankle from the stone bird bath. “Well, there’s Mother Nature again.. Guess I don’t need a shower! Now, I’m saving money on my water bill!”

“Aw, that little Brown Thrasher is having a good ol’ time over there,” Rosalee excitedly stated.

“What d’ya call it?”

“A Brown Thrasher.”

“What an odd name! It sure is.. thrashing about,” Mildred snorted at her own joke.

“Haha, it sure is! Felix and I used to go Birdwatching. It was something we really enjoyed doing together,” Rosalee solemnly admitted.

“I’m sure,” Mildred paused. “Hey! Ya know, I’d love to learn more about wildlife. Maybe we can go birdwatching together sometime. I’ve been- -” she paused again. “I’ve been itching to get out more. I’m sure you are too, eh?”

“Why Milly, that’s a swell idea! I’ve been wanting to see the Herons before they migrate North for the winter!”

“Sounds like a plan, Rose. I’m looking forward to it,” Mildred promised and pivoted. “Rover! Come. Rover,” she called. “Where are you?” She noticed some dirt scattering up into the air near an overgrown aloe plant, she peered past the stone bird bath, and there she found her curly rascal digging a hole. “Whatcha doin’ pup? Whatcha got there? You little troublemaker..” Mildred strategically snatched a hard object out of Rover’s dirty, slobbery mouth. She dusted off the dirt and unveiled a brooch. A bumblebee brooch. It was a gold pendant with black, white, and yellow gems.

“What’d Rover dig up now, Milly?”

“Did you happen to lose a bumblebee brooch, Rose?”

“No, I sold all my jewelry when.. Felix died.. so, I wouldn’t lose the house,” Rosalee dropped her head and frowned.

“Think the previous owner misplaced it years ago?” Mildred asked while closely inspecting the brooch and counting each gem.

“No, I don’t think so. The previous owner was the original owner. He was a lifelong bachelor. Yeah, Bachelor Bennett. He was a strange bird. Lived here for twenty-five years. How long have you lived here now, Milly? Ten years?”

“It’ll be eleven in October.”

“Think one of your visitors misplaced it?” Rosalee asked as she tilted her head.

“No, I don’t think so. We always visited inside.. where the air conditioning is,” Mildred smiled at the thought of enjoying a cup o’ joe in her cool kitchenette. Her stomach growled, Spike heard it, and growled back through the white picket fence.

“Maybe Magnus next door can help ya out.. See how much that baby is worth. He used to be a.. ya know.. a whatchamacallit.. ya know.. someone who looks at jewelry and quotes a price of what it’s worth..” Rosalee trailed off with frustration.

“A jeweler? An appraiser?”

“That’s it! He’s been retired for a decade or so, but he was the best in town. I’m sure he can help ya out.”

“Good to know, thanks. I’ll pop over to his place after breakfast and see if he’s in.”

“Let me know what ya find out! Now, I’m curious!”

“Will do.”

“I’ll make lunch for us and we can chat about it.”

“Sounds lovely. See ya then, Rose!”

Rosalee whipped up some bologna ‘n butter sandwiches with cottage cheese, sliced tomatoes from the garden, and poured some prune juice for lunch. Mildred rang the door bell with her canine companion in tow. Spike squeezed past Rosalee to greet Rover when she opened the door. They went gallivanting down the hallway side by side.

“Hey there! Uhhh,” Rosalee stammered. “W-what’s with the metal d-detector, M-Milly?” She gestured for Mildred to enter and they sat down at her wicker dining room table and chairs under the skylight.

“Oh! I ran into our other neighbor, Leon, when I left Magnus’ place,” Mildred said while putting her sunglasses back on. “I told him about finding a piece jewelry in the backyard and he insisted that I borrow his metal detector. We could check your yard after lunch!”

“Oh, yes, lets,” Rosalee blurted, she hurriedly chewed her food and continued with her mouth full. “So, tell me.. what did Magnus have to say?”

“Rose, I felt like I was on Antique Roadshow! Get ready for this,” Mildred paused for dramatic effect, cracked a sly smile, lowered her sunglasses to look directly into Rosalee’s eager eyes. “Quarter of a million dollars!”

Rosalee’s eyes widened as big an owl’s. “I do declare! My, my, my.. Oh, Milly! What ever will you do with that kinda money?!” she squealed and fanned herself.

“I think I wanna open a senior citizen center.. for widows.. to help women like us.. who feel.. alone.. and lonely. Where we can have a support group to talk to and get the financial assistance we need. What d’ya think?” Mildred inquired.

“Milly, I think that is a superb idea! Can I be your Vice President?”

“Rose, I wouldn’t have it any other way! You’ve been such a Godsend to me ever since.. Mortimer passed,” Mildred’s voice trembled. “Us.. widows.. gotta stick together,” Mildred sniffled. She reached for and held Rosalee’s petite hand. They gazed into one another’s teary eyes.

“Aw, Milly, you’ve done the same for me since.. Felix died,” Rosalee whispered. “I’d be honored to help you with this.”

They wept in each other’s arms for what seemed like a long time. The cuckoo clock chirped above their heads and it startled them back to reality. Mildred helped Rosalee clear the table, they freshened up their faces, and relocated outside to the picnic table for dessert: tapioca pudding. Mildred noticed a little black spider on the edge of the wooden picnic table and gave it have some room. “Table for three,” she thought in an Italian accent and stifled a laugh. Rover slowly approached to sniff the arachnid and tried to lick it, but was simultaneously distracted by Spike’s booming bark at a grasshopper that sprung onto the brick house. The doggos were running all over the place exploring the yard, chasing each other, and getting to know all the little garden creatures. One creature in particular remained undetected by the curious canines: the Praying Mantis. It became one with the foliage and slowly traveled from leaf to leaf, branch to branch, and then vanished.

“Boy, I’m stuffed!” Rosalee announced while patting her stomach.

“Rose, you eat like a bird,” Mildred teased while sipping the last bit of prune juice. “What d’ya say we give that metal detector a try?”

Rosalee sarcastically snickered while standing up, “I say, what are we waiting for?! There could be another fortune back here! After all, ’tis our lucky day!” She gave Mildred a wink.

“Alright, so, Leon said to press this button and wait for the green light to turn on. There it goes. Well, that was easy peasy lemon squeezy.”

“Hear that Spike?! I may be able to afford bottled lemonade after all so you can use my lemon tree as your own personal peeing post!” Rosalee and Mildred giggled. They walked to and fro with the metal detector over Rosalee’s backyard. Spike and Rover followed closely behind. They barked, whined, and tilted their heads when the machine began to beep. The beeping began to rapidly increase.

“Milly, I think we got something!” They carefully placed the metal detector against the white picket fence and started digging with trowels. Spike and Rover joined in on the fun and dug alongside their owners. “Whatcha got boy?! Gimme that,” Rosalee pleaded with Spike as he started to swallow it. “Spike. Out. Now!” He froze, gave her the biggest puppy dog eyes and dropped it onto the grass. “Cripes! It’s a little lizard,” Rosalee shrieked in disgust and tossed it to Mildred. “Ugh, is its guts hanging out, Milly? I can’t look.”

Mildred wiped the debris off the large dark chocolate gems and the shiny gold sparkled across the green lawn. Rover tried to catch the reflecting light like a cat would with a laser pointer. “Rose, it’s not alive.”

“Aw, I was ‘fraid of that.. Should we bury it? We already dug a hole,” Rosalee suggested quietly with a light laugh. She uncovered her eyes and finally examined the item.

“It’s a lizard pendant,” Mildred stated. Their eyes met, Rosalee excitedly tackled her with a strong hug, which knocked them both over into the infamous puny lemon tree. Rover and Spike jumped on top of them and licked their faces in celebration. The foursome became an official dogpile.

Eighteen months later

Mildred and Rosalee were on their way to the ribbon cutting ceremony at the grand opening of their senior citizen center for widows they decided to call: Treasure Gardens. They were also due to receive the key to the city from none other than.. the Mayor! They were tickled pink! They decided to take a detour first.

“I still can’t believe Felix and Mortimer are only a couple plots away from one another,” Mildred told Rosalee while putting the car in park. “These bouquets you put together are gorgeous, Rose. Flowers are something we should incorporate around the office. It’ll help liven up the place. It’ll feel more inviting and homey. What d’ya think?”

“Absolutely. I think that’s a grand idea, Milly! I did pick ’em from your garden, so you did half the work.. Partner,” Rosalee winked at Mildred. They awkwardly hugged over the car’s center gear shift. Spike and Rover both barked out the car window at a squirrel climbing up a nearby tree. The ladies laughed in unison at their playful pups. “Can’t take ’em anywhere without causing mischief,” Rosalee teased and rolled her eyes. Rosalee and Mildred parted ways with their dogs as they exited the vehicle.

Mildred placed the bright botanical bouquet onto a knee high headstone. “Hi honey,” she whispered. “I miss you. Today.. is a good day. It will be a good day, I’ve decided. Today will be.. The. Best. Day. Next to our wedding day, of course,” she pursed her lips together and made a smooching sound. “Oh, honey.. I’m.. living the dream!” She pinched herself and smiled.

Normally, I have an idea and/or photo(s) first and let that inspire the piece I write. This week, I decided to reverse my creative process: write first and let it inspire the photo(s) because I recently purchased a journal called Complete the Story. I admit, it was initially difficult to do, but I’m proud of myself for sticking with it and creating.. differently!

I’m glad I took an alternate path because I think variety is important for a creative person. Keeps you on your toes and keeps your work fresh. I admire those who think outside the box and stray from their comfort zones. I hope the next time you find yourself in a creative funk and can’t seem to feel inspired; that you’ll take the time to explore alternative methods to help you create and achieve your goal(s). Don’t give up! Please share your dreams, fantasies, inspirations, muses, and/or creative processes in the comments. I’m eager to hear about them!

Don’t Have a Cat Attack!

My pet calls me Hex, but I don’t answer to it. I was rescued many moons ago when my pet found me soaking wet under a pallet. I’m a tuxedo goth teen. I’m an only feline now. My brothers from another mother met their tenth lives; Phil was half Maine Coon, half tabby, and he taught me everything I know about being wild because he survived outside without any front claws! Fur real! I ain’t kitten.. My other brother couldn’t have been more opposite! He was an obese ginger and he was rightfully named Fat Boy. He was such a softie! Oh, how my pet misses those boys. It’s been just me and my pet until.. he fell in love with one of his own kind and they decided to move in together. So, I’ve reluctantly taken in my pet’s stray as my own.. she’s growing on me.. I have to say.

When my pet first transported me to our new dwelling, I instantly felt uneasy, the place gave me the creeps.. all three realms of it! My pet and stray have been easily confused because they’re only used to being within one realm, so I just meow to guide them back to me. Oh, how happy they are when they find me! They’ve settled in nicely and everything’s seemingly purrfect.. but if they only knew.. that this place is infested with.. ghosts! Of course, I’m the only one who can see them, so it’s up to me to keep the phantoms at bay.

I earn my keep around here that’s fur sure.. I’m pulling quadruple duty! Not only am I an Exterminator, Therapist, and Security Guard.. but now, I’ve been assigned a new job: Ghost Hunter! I haven’t received any extra food or treats for the overtime I’ve put in. I repeatedly remind my pet every morning and evening that I deserve more food. Hell, I take full advantage of every opportune moment I can get: whenever he goes in the kitchen or near my bowl.. I scream that I deserve a bonus! He’s a tightwad and never delivers. I’ve even beseeched the stray, she just whispers sweet nothings in my ear, pats my head, and scurries away; I’m wearing her down though.. she’ll crack soon.. I can feel it in my bones.

I’ve lost weight traveling through these three realms day and night. I put my nine lives on the line to protect my pet and stray against these meddling spooks who haunt their dreams.. Or shall I say nightmares?! I tuck the stray into bed every night with my freshly sharpened claws in hopes to keep her and my pet safe. She winces in pain because blood needs to be sacrificed so I can cast a Protection Spell so the apparitions won’t savagely suck out her soul! I don’t want to have to devour her face if she perishes. Of course, I’d be ever grateful for something extra to eat, however.. I don’t know where this stray came from, if she’s been vaccinated, or if she’s even had a recent flea dip! I just can’t take that risk. Ahhh, so tempting though.. I need to remember my mission: Protect my pet and his stray. I cannot let my pet lose his new stray. He’s lost so much already. I must secure her well-being at all costs.

Once my pet and stray are surely asleep, I clock in to work the night shift:

  • Cast the Protection Spell
    • smear the crimson life liquid along the wooden snooze frame
    • check under frame for any Boogey Monsters
    • meow the sacred song of my ancestors
    • frolic around the slumber chamber
    • hiss at the Flying Particle Ghouls to retreat back in the ducts
    • tickle the stray’s face with my whiskers
    • seal it with a sandpaper kiss on the stray’s elbow
  • Conduct a Perimeter Check
    • rub against every entryway
    • scratch loose threads on every carpeted floor
    • shake my loose hair follicles onto the hardwood floors
    • sprinkle every rug with my regurgitated fur
    • slink under every piece of furr-niture
    • pounce up and down every staircase between realms
    • scour behind the wet transparent curtain and utilize this time for re-hydration at the leaky faucet
  • Secure the Exterior
    • setup guard post on the windowsill for optimal position
    • if view is obstructed, squeeze through the thin horizontal window panels
    • be on the lookout for Squirrel and/or Bird Zombies per the nearby jungle graveyard
    • overturn every potted botanical specimen and spread the soil around because this traps all Supernatural Manifestations in their tracks
    • chase and swat any Flying Bug Specters and squish their entrails about
    • knock every dish off the kitchen counter into sharp shards of glass and cut down the Sanctimonious Spirits
    • inspect discard bins for any food scraps because..

IT’S ALMOST TIME FOR BREAKFAST!!!

When the bright ball in the sky appears and my pet arises, my day shift consequentially begins:

  • Break the Protection Spell
    • lick the dry sacrificed blood
    • check for Boogey Monsters
    • meow the sacred song of my ancestors
    • circle around my pet until he steps on my tail
      • wail in agony

[PAWS for dramatic effect]

My pet finally spills food into my bowl and loudly exclaims about the remnants of my back-breaking work I left during the night. I’m glad to hear my pet appreciates the amount of time I invest to keep him and the stray safe. I am extremely flexible, and I always land on my feet. Luckily, all I need is an eight-hour catnap to recover so I can work another night shift!

I hope the next time you notice your pet’s behavior, especially when their life drastically changes, that you’ll be inquisitive enough to research possible explanations. You may learn something new to help them adjust. If you do, please share any fun facts and/or funny stories you may have in the comments below! I’d love to hear about them! I’m sure my other readers would too!

Transformation

I walk through life three steps forward and two steps back. I’ve always struggled with my mental health. My earliest memory is at the age of five and not being able to sleep because I’d be worrying about what happened earlier that day, what would happen the next day, and/or what the future held. I found myself organizing and setting up my toy figurines instead of playing with them. I played well with other kids but preferred to play by myself because other kids made messes and I just couldn’t have that. I deeply empathized with other people’s struggles just as if I would be going through them myself. No one put a name to these feelings, behaviors, or habits until I decided to go to therapy in my mid-twenties. I was diagnosed with obsessive compulsive personality disorder, anxiety, and depression (I discovered I’m an empath as well). It was all beginning to make sense. I was comforted by the fact that I.. wasn’t alone.

My therapist put it simply: “Having anxiety and depression is like straddling a doorway with one foot inside and one foot out. The foot inside represents depression, worrying about your past. The foot outside represents anxiety, worrying about your future. The threshold represents the present and you’re just pissing on it.” My therapist utilized a specific type of therapy during our sessions called DBT. She gave me homework from scanned DBT chapter packets; I would read it, highlight sections I connected with, write within each activity and answer the corresponding questions. My therapist and I would discuss each chapter during our sessions. This type of hands-on approach really helped me feel more in control of my mental health. Within these DBT chapter packets, I learned about mindfulness, grounding, self-care, healthy outlets, it’s okay to say “No,” and about medication (pill shaming). I’ve equipped myself with an arsenal of tools to help me throughout the day, especially at work: I listen to music (free with no commercials), snacks/mints/water within reach, meaningful decorations, soft ribbon, and squishy toys. I prefer to utilize grounding because it stimulates my other senses, distracts my mind, and forces me to focus on these individual items/sensations instead of dwelling on the issue(s).

Some of my favorite self-care and healthy outlets that I enjoy are:

  • Not answering my cell phone
    • for business calls outside working hours
    • while visiting with company
  • Dance2Fit classes
    • highly recommend Sylvia’s studio in Hamilton
    • it’s worth the commute!
  • Comedy clubs
    • Laughter is the best medicine!
  • Clean up after company leaves
    • thereby being fully present
    • considerate of their time
  • Massage therapy
    • physical health matters too!
  • Strolling through the Village of Mariemont
  • Waterfront views
  • Coloring, writing, or reading in nooks while listening to my radio program
    • highly recommend Mystery Playhouse Whistler/Suspense (M-F @ 7pm)
  • Creating this blog!

I also learned in therapy that I’m a constant complainer, which I’m sure I inherited (nature vs nurture). While Facebooking, I came across a video of an internet personality, Kristina Kuzmic, who instantly drew me in with her New Year’s Resolution. I don’t usually participate in New Year’s resolutions, however this one seemed like something I needed to do. I kept this activity to myself and gradually noticed my life to change.. for the better! My perspective on situations and my life in general drastically lightened. I stuck with it, every day, three hundred sixty-five days later.. I felt like a different person! I highly recommend this exercise to anyone who struggles with seeing the silver lining each day.

I discovered more of Kristina Kuzmic’s inspirational videos (I highly recommend following her)! She talks about being a mom and wife mostly, however there are other topics she touches on that I can relate to. A favorite video of mine hit home because my mental health issues stem from childhood (as I’m sure most people’s do too). This other video resonated with me because when I lost my classmate, coworker, and friend.. ’twas a traumatic experience that I couldn’t seem to shake on my own, which prompted me to seek help in the form of therapy and medication.

“..You’ve been through a lot and here you are, wiser, stronger and still you!..” -My college professor stated when he suggested that I write.

This one line means the world to me because it feels good to know that my efforts haven’t gone unnoticed. I’ve transformed over the years. Through blood, sweat, and tears, I’ve learned a lot about myself, tested boundaries, and yet my character has remained intact. As much as I’ve lost, I’ve gained so much in return: a full understanding of my mental health issues thus not feeling.. alone. I’ve become aware of triggers and have created plans for various scenarios. I’ve acknowledged my faults and am dedicated to improving myself. I’ve become selective with the company that I keep therefore I spend my time more wisely. I’ve learned to enjoy my own company, which used to terrify me! I’m gradually pushing limits to “messes” around the house, which has helped my new cohabitation situation a lot. I’ve been trying new things that scare me in hopes to overcome them.. I’m still working on that one! Haha..

The above photo was my inspiration for this week’s blog post about how we all go through a transformation that changes who we are. This tree was severely damaged and had to be cut down. The city of Hamilton was able to preserve and transform this historical landmark into a functional sculpture piece for future generations to enjoy!

I was apprehensive to publicly share my internal struggles this week, however am glad I took the risk because I think vulnerability can be a powerful thing. I admire those who possess and share this quality. I hope the next time you feel stuck in your head and you just can’t seem to shake it; that you’ll take the time to seek the help you deserve. Trust that you are not alone. Please share your transformational stories in the comments. I’m interested to hear about them!

Life’s a B..lur

We loaded up into ol’ Ruby headed to a neighboring town to interview for a college internship at a photography studio. We decided to make a road trip out of it and to get a jump start on next semester. It was our summer vacation, after all.. What’s work with no play? No fun, that’s what! The key to happiness is balance. My gal pal and I were attached at the hip: we worked together, had all the same classes, and even carpooled to save some dough! We fit the stereotypical college student roles perfectly: always broke, starving.. I mean, striving artists! We had to be creative to survive in this cruel world.

“Daphne, when ya gonna get your A.C. fixed?! I’m melting,” I complained again while staring out the passenger window.

“♪♫ Shyanne.. I’m working on it.. Ol’ Ruby needs some TLC-eeeee.. she’s an expensive Drama Queeeeeen! Just put your window all the way dowwwwwn ♬,” Daphne sang along with the blaring radio.

I didn’t wanna mess up my hair, but decided since I was already a hot mess, I might as well just let the fresh country air blow away the beads of sweat off my freckled face. I fiddled with the squeaky, manual window crank and with each rotation, felt my arm muscles spasm.

“Add a can of WD-40 to the laundry list for ol’ Ruby,” I stated as both of our butts lifted up out of the maroon front bench seat. “Hey! Take it easy on these hills.. You know I get car sick.. We ain’t hill hoppin’..”

“I can’t help it, I’m going the speed limit,” Daphne stated matter-of-factly.

“Do ya have a litter bag? Just in case?” I pleaded as my stomach gurgled.

“Yeah, in the glove box. Just make sure to slam it.. when you close it.. Ol’ Ruby is temperamental,” Daphne chuckled while patting the dusty dashboard. “Are we heading in the right direction, Miss Navigator?”

“Yeah, just keep West,” I replied with a cough and sneeze. I took a couple deep breaths in and out and closed my eyes. I surprised myself with a quick recovery. All those long road trips with my family semi-prepared me on how to deal with my car sickness. My dad would purposely give it the gas over hills just to churn my stomach. Anything for a laugh.. but I never laughed.

Daphne interrupted my thought, “Did you bring your camera?”

“You know it,” I squealed while unveiling my new digital camera like a Bob Barker Beauty.

“Yay! Let’s document our adventure,” Daphne suggested and wiggled in her seat. “Everything is so green!”

“It sure is,” I exclaimed as I wrapped the camera strap around my wrist and fastened it against my pale skin. I grasped the camera tightly, peered through the viewfinder, and snapped dozens of photos outside the passenger window. I adjusted the angle and zoom to capture a good variety. I tried not to get my reflection in the side mirror in every shot. That would be a totally amateur move!

I put the camera in my lap as I closed my eyes, stretched out my neck to breathe in the crisp country air, and to feel the warm sun upon my rosy cheeks. The radio changed to a commercial and it reverted me back to reality. As I was scrolling through the camera preview screen to see what I had captured, I announced with a frown, “I can’t seem to get a shot in focus or with the correct amount of exposure.” I let out a sigh.

“Well, that’s okay! Even out of focus and overexposed photos can be interesting,” Daphne reassured me. “Post them anyway, tag me of course, and maybe they’ll grow on you. Different always stands out from the crowd,” Daphne gave me a playful wink and smiled at her own advice.

I stuck my tongue out at her and we both giggled like little school girls. Oh, how I admired Daphne’s style; she really did march to the beat of her own drum. Her creativity was contagious and I was itching to be inspired. I had learned a lot from Daphne’s carefree attitude in and outside of the classroom. My OCD forced my artwork to color inside the lines. I relished the fact she could create an unorganized yet interesting piece of art and it still be professional! Such talent at such a young age. Daphne was a couple-ish years my junior, but seemed to be wise beyond her years. We were similar in that way. We both had our shit together: responsible, independent, mature women who loved expressing ourselves in a colorful way, which could be perceived as.. immature.

“Shyanne, I think I took a wrong turn.. I don’t see signs for Broomfield anymore,” Daphne muttered as she frantically read each passing road sign.

“Oh, man.. Okay.. Pull over,” I instructed while examining our Colorado state map. “Alright, we were going West and turned to pass through Westminster, haha.. get it?! West, Westminster.. What a co-inky-dink!”

“Very punny,” Daphne teased.

“Okay, we’re in Thorton; the city, not the gas station! Haha,” I looked up from the map at Daphne and she stifled a laugh. I continued, “Take 25 North, then get off at 128 West, and we should be there in no time!”

“Whew! I’m glad you’re the navigator,” Daphne admitted as she checked to rejoin traffic.

“You just gotta know how to read a map! My mom taught me,” I gloated while folding the map carefully.

“And.. you know how to correctly fold a map! I mean.. you’re a freak of nature,” Daphne joked. “You sure you’re not an alien from outer space?!”

“Ya caught me!” I confessed as I put up both hands. “We’re headed to a spaceship where me and my alien comrades are gonna beam you up to our lab and probe you!”

“Okay, but don’t give me too much laughing gas because I’ll cry laugh and I’m an ugly crier,” Daphne pleaded with her big hazel puppy dog eyes.

We finally looked at each other and just lost it. We had a non-stop giggle fit for a solid minute. “Fun fact,” I giggled in between words, “Area 51.. is in.. Lincoln County.. Nevada.. which is like.. 10 hours away.. hope you.. got enough gas.. to get.. ol’ Ruby there!” I pulled out a US map to examine for comedic effect.

Daphne poked the map into my nose. “Girl, you are something else! I’m getting kinda hungry, you wanna stop off somewhere?”

“Do you really have to ask?! Oh! There’s a Mickey D’s!”

“Why isn’t there an Unhappy Meal for adults?” Daphne asked with a straight face.

“If there was, what would the toy be?”

“A mini bottle of alcohol! Duh!”

“Oh. My. God. Yeesss! Let’s pitch them this idea and we’ll be bazillionaires!”

“After we pay off all of our student loans, we’ll have just enough money leftover to buy.. an Unhappy Meal!”

We lost it again. Our giggle fest continued. We heard one of our favorite songs on the radio from a band we just bought concert tickets to see in the fall, so we just had to stay in ol’ Ruby to rock out until the very end of the song. I played air guitar while Daphne drummed on the steering wheel. We dramatically serenaded one another while holding hands during the last verse.

“We should cut a record!” Daphne exclaimed as we were walking across the parking lot. She glanced to me for approval, but I shook my head. “We could sing back up!” We both shook our heads and continued walking. “I got it!” She stopped, so I stopped.. and we glared at one another. She paused for dramatic effect.. “We could be hype girls!”

“Yeeeeeesssss!” We danced all the way into the restaurant and stood in a long line to order.

“Shyanne, check it! There’s a vending machine over there! Wanna get a temporary tattoo?!”

“Oohh! Well, I mean.. we gotta look our best for the interview!”

We scrounged up just enough change. “On the count of three, let’s open ’em together,” Daphne whispered.

We counted together, “1.. 2.. 3..”

“I gotta flaming guitar! What’d you get?!” Daphne asked.

“I gotta spider in its web! Where should we put them?” I asked.

“Hmm.. I don’t know.. Oh! I know!.. On our necks! We gotta show ’em off! We’re hype girls! We gotta look the part..”

“Risky. Wild. Daring. I like it. Let’s do it! After we eat..”

“Duh!”

We found a booth near a window facing a quaint little court yard. Daphne went over to save our seats while I went to fill up our cups at the soda machine.

“What do you want to drink?” I asked over my shoulder.

“Hi-C with a little ice!” Daphne excitedly replied.

“You got it!” I skipped across the dining area and sang what I was doing, “♪♫ Fill this cup with a little ice. Yeaahhh.. Pour some Hi-C. Oohh.. Overflooooooooow ♬”

“You gotta nice voice,” a police officer commented as he grabbed a handful of napkins.

“Uhhh.. thank you,” I muttered as my cheeks turned beet red. Oh, how I blushed! I quickly cleaned up my mess from the spilt soda on the counter and hurried over to join Daphne, “That copper just complimented my singing,” I whispered. “I was just being silly.. Guess I sound better than I thought..”

“Girl, I’ll sing backup for ya,” Daphne blurted out.. a little louder than she intended. She instantly noticed the other diners glaring at us.

I giggled quietly, “You gotta audition first.” We both dipped our french fries into the same ranch dressing container. “Hey, I like your nails, where do you get them done at?!”

“Oh, I do ’em myself!” Daphne shoved her perfectly manicured hand in my face. “I just slap on the polish and let the paint fall off my fingers when I get a shower the next day..”

“Sounds like a foolproof process right there,” I declared in awe. “I’ll have to try that sometime. What color is that by the way?” I stuffed half a dozen fries in my mouth at once.

“Burgundy Sunset Bliss,” she dramatically quoted with a wave.

“Really?”

“Hell if I know. Sounds like a color to me.”

“You should submit that to Pantone!”

“I just might,” Daphne mumbled through a mouthful of her double cheeseburger.

We made a couple pit-stops along the way as we walked down the street to the photography studio for Daphne’s interview. We captured some Kodak moments: Daphne posed in front of a white picket fence with her Mickey D’s cup o’ Hi-C. I posed leaning against a brick wall in an alley because my alter ego grew up in The Outsiders.

This story doesn’t have a traditional beginning, middle, and end. It just abruptly stops.. because unfortunately.. my friend’s life abruptly stopped. I decided to highlight the good times we had together while she was a part of my life. Life’s a B..lur. The world is moving at such a high speed.. that every once and awhile.. I just gotta stop.. and enjoy it.. and appreciate it for what it is.. before it’s too late.

I enjoyed traveling down memory lane, thumbing through my ol’ photo albums, and sharing an inspired by my true experience with y’all this week (an excerpt, if you will). I hope the next time you feel your head spinning and your life becomes a b..lur; that you’ll take a second to slow down to savor each and every precious moment, and cherish them while you can. I guarantee you’ll feel better about whatever life throws at ya. Please share any merry-go-round moments you’ve had in the comments. I can’t wait to hear about them.

Six by Eight

The inspiration behind this week’s blog post came about when I least expected it.. Per usual! I tend to mentally backtrack, analyze the chain of events and ask myself: “Why did I do that? Had I seen something similar before and subconsciously wanted to see more like it?” It’s a general question, but in this particular case, I asked myself this when I was reminiscing about a tour my S.O. and I took in San Francisco to.. Alcatraz! I was instantly enthralled by its size, history and architecture; so much in fact that it prompted our most recent tour to the Ohio State Reformatory. I highly recommend both tours by the way!

So, there I was.. racking my brain as to why I scheduled these tours.. then.. finally, it came to me! ‘Twas most likely when I first toured a jail! Ten-ish years ago, I volunteered my graphic design services to a small marketing agency located in one of the business suites in Butler County’s old Municipal Building. During one lunch break, my boss decided to take me on a private tour of the abandoned jail on the top floor, which I didn’t even know was there! I remember taking a school field trip of my hometown; which included the old Municipal Building! I only recall seeing the 911 Dispatch Center in the basement and the Fire Station on the northside of the building, which is now a brewery (also, highly recommend). Luckily, I was able to go back up to the jail and take photos! This week, I decided to change it up and write a story from an inmate’s perspective. Something you might read in their journal or hear from their interview in a documentary.

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the blogger’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

I’ve been sentenced and fined; it’ll be a three months stay, I’ll pay a fortune to Uncle Sam, plus probation. Two plump Police Officers escorted me from the municipal courtroom into a freshly polished gray marble hallway where we waited for the elevator operator to accompany us inside a cramped lift. The operator hovered above a little stool in the corner. He latched a squeaky metal gate, pulled a stiff lever, and an outer door folded to a close like an accordion. We shimmied our way up a couple flights. I could barely make out the weathered plaque above the operator’s head. I managed to finally read it without my glasses: “Maximum weight limit: 400 pounds.” Oh, yeah, we’re not gonna make it, there’s four of us and we each weigh at least a hundred pounds! I just hope it’ll be a swift and painless death as we plummet to the bottom of the elevator shaft into a large steaming meat pie to feed the other pigs.

As the operator unveiled my new dwelling, the air felt different; stale and humid. I winced with disgust and shook my head as I could already smell the sweaty inmates. It was just my luck to get stuck in the clink on the hottest day of 1959. The judge reassured me that this was a temporary stay until they made room in the overcrowded Butler County jail. My double shackles rattled as I shuffled out onto a dirty concrete floor. I could feel the flames lick me as I walked into a beam of sunlight past a chain linked door, which I noticed had two sets of stairs behind it; one up and one down. I’m sure I’d find out where they each lead to later. I noticed another ray of sunlight coming from a window at the end of the hallway. That surprised me because I envisioned jail to be a windowless dungeon where they locked you up and threw away the key.

The salt and pepper haired Police Officer rhythmically rapped upon a massive vault-like steel door. This sort of door belonged in a bank protecting money; not a jail, protecting society from criminals. He slowly opened a latch to look through a miniature window to visually verify our arrival to the inside guard. I squinted to make out a faint etching on the plate glass that read:
“Let me out.”
I finally admitted to myself that I was petrified. What will I have to endure here for.. who-knows-how-long?! I distinctly heard tin cups clanging across jail cell bars. I thought that only happened in the movies.. The massive door opened in slow motion.

There were eight cells; each were equipped with two bunks, a toilet and a sink. That’s it. Parcopresis quickly set in. How am I gonna drop a deuce without feeling like I’m on display for these perverts to gawk at?! I counted fifteen inmates; some greeted me with their hoarse catcalls, pocket mirrors, and/or tin cups. The other inmates were laying motionless in their bunks. I was lucky number sixteen. We officially became a full house. I stepped over a carved-in-concrete checkerboard in front of my cell. This gave me hope that we had some freedom outside our six by eight cells. I’m a whiz at games. That is what ultimately landed me in here. I ran an illegal gambling ring out of my loft downtown and.. it got raided. I managed to weasel my way out of doing hard time upstate thanks to my hotshot brother-in-law lawyer, Peter. I really owe him. Big. Might as well start by conning these poor schmucks’ out of their commissary items to purchase something fancy for him. Least I could do. He’d prefer I not reoffend though. My mother has openly admitted she’d rather have Peter as her son than the washed up criminal she biologically spawned.

The rookie guard had difficulty releasing me from my restraints because he couldn’t get a firm grip on the key with his sweaty hands. The other guard slammed the cell door closed and lingered nearby. I ignored my cellmate as I quietly settled in to the bottom bunk. A metal spring from my paper thin mattress poked me in the shoulder blade as I laid down to catch my breath. The metal spring propped me toward a window; I discovered the cell bars perfectly framed the Butler County Courthouse across the street. This view reminded me that I could’ve been tried there and received a harsher punishment of three to five years instead of three months. Just gotta hang on for three months. This thought was interrupted by the sound of my cellmate taking a piss.. in the sink. Ugh, I can tell we’re not gonna get along. First impressions are everything. Wonder what his first impression of me was? The strong silent type? Retarded? I quickly dismissed this thought as he aggressively shook his dick.. and moaned loudly. Oh, my God.. He’s jerking off! Disgusting. I rolled over to face the wall and pulled my pillow around my ears to muffle the noise. I finally opened my eyes to see a row of tally marks scratched into the paint. I counted seven. Wonder how long this guy’s sentence was? I bet he died of heat stroke in this oven before he was transferred to county. I forced this thought out of my head. I will make it. I had to. My cellmate might not make it though. I may just smother him in his sleep.

I must’ve nodded off because I was startled awake by a guard barking orders to line up for Recreation. Whatever that meant. I instinctively sat up and busted my head on the bottom of the top bunk with a loud thunk. I spit out, “Fuck,” and rubbed my forehead. I cautiously inspected my wet hand. It wasn’t blood. I looked down to see a body outline of sweat left on my mattress. I felt like crying. I was so uncomfortably hot. I’m sure my tears would’ve been masked by the sweat pouring down my face. I dizzily stood up, stretched with a yawn and accidentally punched my cellmate in the shoulder. I forgot I wasn’t alone. Our eyes finally met.

“Oh, ‘cuse me,” I muttered.
I extended my hand, “Patrick O’Reilly.”
My cellmate chuckled, “Eugene Schwartz.”

We exchanged glances and shook hands. I immediately regretted shaking Eugene’s hand. Bet he didn’t even wash his hands after he pissed and.. came. Yuck. I wiped my right hand on my black and white striped jumpsuit and shoved both hands into my pockets. Each pocket had a pinky size hole in it.

The guard barked again to line up. We faced forward and waited for our cell door to open. I caught a glimpse of something above our heads. I reared my head back to get a better look. The sun shone through a line of cutouts. My eyes adjusted to make out the shapes. They were shamrocks. I bowed my head, crossed myself, and quietly said a prayer to Saint Christopher to protect me during my journey ahead.

We exited our cells, the guard counted us, and the other guard confirmed the head count on his clipboard. We marched single file out of the cell block and into the hallway; one guard was playing follow-the-leader while the other guard rode caboose. We went through the chain linked door and proceeded upstairs. With each step we climbed, I could feel the temperature rise ten degrees. Sweat just poured down from my brow onto my jumpsuit. I wiped my forehead with my already wet sleeve. While we pivoted on a platform, I used this time to check how much further til we reached our “Recreational” destination: another set of stairs to go. I noticed the ceiling and walls were deteriorating. Pieces of plaster sprinkled my face so I instinctively averted my gaze, shook my head and marched ahead.

We finally reached the top of the stairs to a door exiting out onto the roof. I peered through a metal handrail and thought I saw someone waving. They weren’t waving. It was a statue on top of the Hamilton memorial monument across the street. I can’t remember the official name of it. A burst of dank air expelled when the door to the roof opened. My thinning hair tickled my face as I blinked into the afternoon sun. I mentally added a pair of sunglasses to my list of needed commissary items. The guard barked, “Enjoy your two hours of playtime, kiddies!” The other guard snorted at his co-worker’s childish announcement. The inmates segregated themselves: whites on the left, colored to the right, and beaners down the middle. I didn’t join any group. I just paced alongside the ledge and admired the Great Miami River. I just wanted to jump in and cool off. I’ve always been a loner. Content with my own company. Sometimes, I did long for more. I don’t mind admitting that I have regularly paid for company with a lady of the night.

Recreation time had come and gone already. “Time’s up! Line up,” the guard’s booming voice sent a scared pigeon fluttering toward me. I covered my face with both arms and crouched down. I casually dusted myself off and joined the line. During head count, I noticed there was not a single guardrail, fence, or barbed wire to keep anybody from falling off the five story building to their death; whether accidental, suicidal, or homicidal. There wasn’t anything recreational about this “Recreational Roof” at all. No weights. No basketball hoop. Nothing. How I longed for a book to get lost into. Anything to distract me from this cruel reality. I mentally added some books to my list of needed commissary items. I’d read a telephone book, a dictionary, a Bible. Anything. Maybe I’d write a book. Hell, I got the time. Eighty-nine days to go. In a six by eight jail cell.

[end scene]

Did you enjoy the story? I hope you did! I really enjoyed writing it! I definitely pushed myself out of my comfort zone with this one. I’m open to hear any constructive critiques you may have to help improve my storytelling. Feel free to drop a comment below!

I hope the next time you find yourself mentally backtracking how/why you decided to do something, especially something uncharacteristic; that you’ll be inquisitive to take a moment to examine the chain of events that lead you there. I guarantee you’ll learn something new about yourself! Please share any groundbreaking revelations you’ve discovered about yourself in the comments! I’d love to hear about them! I’m sure the other readers would too!